Lana Del Rey for GQ Magazine

 

Photographs by Mariano Vivanco. See the rest here.

 

 FROM THE INTERVIEW:

"'lt’s been nine years since my last drink... That’s really why I got sent to boarding school aged 14 — to get sober. I was a big drinker at the time. I would drink every day. I would drink alone. I thought the whole concept was so fucking cool. A great deal of what I wrote on Born To Die is about these wilderness years. A lot of the time when I write about the person that I love, I feel like I’m writing about New York. And when I write about the thing that I’ve lost I feel like I’m writing about alcohol because that was the first love of my life. Sure, there have been people, but it’s really alcohol. 

My parents were worried, I was worried. I knew it was a problem when I liked it more than I liked doing anything else. I was like, I’m fucked. I am totally fucked. Like, at first it’s fine and you think you have a dark side – it’s exciting – and then you realise the dark side wins every time if you decide to indulge in it. It’s also a completely different way of living when you know that, it’s like being a different species of person. It was horrific. It was the worst thing that ever happened to me.'” 

Lana has also struggled with the public recently. Apparently she was sued for breaking copyright laws for her "Video Games" video. Over the past year, she has faced a mountain of criticism. After being asked if she felt betrayed by America, Lana responded: 

“'No, just like the love of my life isn’t with me any more. The Hollywood community has been so good to me and they didn’t have to be, but not New York. As a person who becomes really attached to places for their energy and their beauty, for me New York was a match. To lose it, it really felt like my life was over. It’s a totally different life experience when you have to learn to love the things that don’t love you back. It’s the last great life experience. Not that many people have to live like this – live without their icons or their idols or their country. I know people won’t be listening to my music next year, but I still will have lost those places I cared about so dearly.' 

Such was the criticism, and Del Rey’s heartbreak, that, from the sounds of it, either this year or last year, she came close to pressing the self-destruct button once again:

'Yes. It hasn’t been activated in some time. In the last two years I do feel more upset, which kind of triggers those feelings, making me feel as if not everything is in my control. The bigger things get, the bigger this whole thing gets, the easier it is for things like that to start happening again. When I feel like I’m being overwhelmed it’s hard to remain a guiding force. That’s one reason to keep things small, play small venues, that sort of thing, which is what I always wanted to do.'"

 

 Until I read this interview, it didn't occur to me how difficult Lana Del Rey's rise to fame has been. And that should could be some honestly affected by it... Most celebrities are so adamant about how much they DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK OF THEM!!!!11!1. So many shrug it off and flip the bird to the media, I forget about how the average person would react to such a backlash. I forget how I would react in a situation similar to Lana's... I go back and forth on her music, trying to decide if I like it or not. But I let it slip my mind that everyone else has been doing it too-- more vocally and more aggressively. The opinions of the haters have been in mass quantity and at mass volume. I hope this hasn't gotten her down too much... though I do appreciate her honesty. The interview paints a picture of depression and, eventually, acceptance of the way her last year was spent. And she hasn't lost crucial parts of herself, at least. I don't pray, but my thoughts are with her? If that makes sense. Whatever is best for her, I fully support it. Just be okay. Okay?