Travel Post #2: Berlin, Germany! (July 25th)

Outside of my sister's door, leftover from her American / 4th of July party.

July 25th, 2013

     After a wonderful 10 hours of sleep, the four of us had a "Big French Breakfast" at a restaurant called Rocco. If only all of our European meals were that lovely... Afterwards, this day became dedicated to running errands. I picked up tape at a grocery store for my travel journal (which was originally a horrid composition book, in which I had to literally tape every single page back in at the end of the day), and got two hand towels for 1,50€ each at a giant super department store called (I think?) Galerie. In addition, on this day we met up with my cousin's internet friend, Thilo! He lives in Berlin, and took us to an outdoor Italian restaurant for lunch. I had an interesting fusion of carbonated soda and lemonade known as Lemonsoda.

     In the midst of eating among the trees and aging buildings, I realized that it is okay to take things slowly when it comes to traveling. Though it cost an arm and a leg to get to Europe, and though I naturally wanted to see EVERYTHING that Berlin had to offer, I also had to be honest with myself. I was tired. It was hot outside. I was beyond thirsty, no matter how much water I drank. Most importantly, I had to let myself accept that despite everything, I was on vacation. This trip was not only a means of seeing the world, but an escape from my everyday and the stress that comes with it.  What was the point if I spent the entire trip working myself up over the things I missed? No matter how much there is to experience, there will always be more that you missed out on. So don't stress yourself out. Relax if needed. Make sure you're enjoying whatever it is that you are doing, whether that is seeing a famous landmark or eating a quiet lunch. Especially because most of the family groups on "vacation" that I encountered seemed nothing but time-restrained, stressed, miserable, and argumentative. But more on that when we get to Paris ;) Basically, LIVE YOUR DREAMS. But don't letting living your dreams get in the way of your mental wellness.

      The evening began with a heavenly visit to Schlachtensee, a lake outside of the city's center. It was a godsend in the form of cold water! Especially considering Berlin was experiencing a heat wave. Beyond that, everything about the experience was pure summer fun. People were rowing canoes on the water or balancing on a giant log or drinking wine from the bottle. It was so different from California, for the waterfront didn't even have a beach. There was only a small strip dirt in between the trees and the lake. I swam to the other end of our alcove, and there was only underwater grass and tree roots as the water got more shallow. Here, I met my sister's American friends, all studying abroad from schools in the United States. They were kind enough, immediately welcoming us into their group, and shared their lovely cherry wine with me. I'm thankful they were the talkative types. Now that I'm in training for my new job, I've realized it still takes a great deal of effort for me to meet new people. But Natalie's friends were outspoken, so I didn't have to be! Afterwards, we all walked to a friend's house in a lovely suburban neighborhood for a BBQ. The street was full of old houses and tall trees; it was very reminiscent of the East Coast. I feel like it could have been a setting for one of those ghost/haunting/horror movies. But we all hung out in the backyard, listened to good music, and I got to try both BACON STRIPS ON A STICK and A SLAB OF CHEESE GRILLED ON THE BARBEQUE. Delicious! A+, 10/10, would highly recommend. Especially the bacon on a stick!! BACON ON A STICK.

     At around 11pm, the four of us walked back to the S-Bahn and traveled on home. Despite what I thought, and it's a bit illogical that I used to think this, jet lag doesn't disappear after the first day. I wish we could have been true Berliners, staying up until 5AM with not a care in the world, but we were nowhere near that level. But that's alright- we needed the rest. Tomorrow, we were off to Sachsenhausen!

♥ To be continued... ♥

The Banshee: A Playlist

The Banshee from reservoirsnogs on 8tracks Radio.

     I've made another playlist that requires explanation! 

  While Cathy and I were talking about our excitement for Halloween (two months is not too early to get pumped....), we started devising plans for playlists. If you are beyond giddy that the season of haunts and candy is rapidly approaching, check out Cathy's new playlist: "Put On Your Costumes." It's full of Halloween-coated happiness!

     I, on the other hand, couldn't really figure out what I wanted to do. After much deliberation, I decided on a playlist about ghosts. Then, somehow over the next day, it evolved into an entire story surrounding folklore about the mythical Banshee. I'm not going to pretend I did a ton of research, but I tried to at least go beyond Wikipedia, and found a description on a website called "Your Irish."

 Here's a bit of info about the Screaming Banshee of Ireland:

"The first [of many legends] is that she is the ghost of a young woman who was brutally killed and died so horribly that her spirit is left to wander the world, watching her family and loved ones warning them [through an ear-deafening screech] when a violent death is imminent."

  According to the website, rather than thinking of the Banshee as an evil hag who drives her victims insane and brings about violent death (which I guess is a common school of thought in the world of folklore), Irish legend favors these ideas about the Banshee:

"The Banshee does not ‘bring’ death but warns that death is near and this gives the family a chance to prepare and it is not necessarily a violent death it may be of a family member that has lived to 106 years of age! She is there as an escort to ensure that the loved one passes safely to the other side."

      Somehow, these two descriptions about the Banshee culminated in my brain as a work of fiction.

Also, TW for some violence against women, I'm sorry :/

     The subject of this playlist was once a young woman who was brutally murdered in the middle of winter. Because of the emotional trauma of such a violent death, her soul remained on the Earth as a Banshee. At first, she does not realize what she has become. She is uncontrollably transported from home to home, suddenly flooded with an overwhelming sense of dread. The intensity of this emotion causes her to screech at the top of her lungs, for somehow she knows a death is about to occur. Leaving each family stunned, the woman is given no choice but to follow each victim and watch his or her demise. Her task makes itself known; she is to help these souls cross over to the other side. 

     When these victims perish, she appears to them. Some are relieved that death has finally come after a long, happy life. Some are children, confused at the very concept. The Banshee greets them all uncertainly, and eventually understands that she must explain to them their fate. Only when the victims are assured that someone knows of their death, that they are not just a body rotting with no one to care, do they cross over. This is why the Banshee's task is so vital: she gives the warning.

     But she did not receive the same consolation. The Banshee was murdered in the frost of a lonely wood, and though perhaps her family, too, was warned of death's approach, her mutilated body was never found. A funeral was never arranged, for they still held onto a lingering hope that maybe it was still a mistake, maybe she just ran away, maybe she'll be back in a little while. And so, the Banshee is unable to move on with the other spirits. For however brief or lengthy their meeting, the other souls cross over. But she is left on Earth, utterly alone. When she is not giving a warning, she cannot be seen by humans. And even so, her voice only echoes in each home for a moment or two. The Banshee exists only to aid death's victims, and at the end of each encounter, she ends up in isolation. 

     With the trauma of her own murder still weighing heavily upon her psyche, the constant presence of death makes the Banshee grow cold and pessimistic. Every demise brings flashbacks of her own. Every moment of loneliness becomes maddening. She begins to feel sick with feelings of hatred, isolation, dread, and bitterness. Her appearance no longer resembles the young woman she was. Instead, her eyes have grown hollow and black, her skin has become nothing but a thin sheet over rattling bones, and she has begun to notice that the souls she greets in their transition are increasingly afraid of her.

     At first, their frightened reactions serve as comfort. Her demonic exterior makes these victims feel as upset and horrified as she did after her murder. But soon, their tearful eyes and tensing shoulders no longer bring even a small sense of joy. She grows numb to joy's company. And not long after, she grows disturbed by its very presence. She begins to see herself in each person. Their fear and confusion mimics her own. Upon these subtle realizations, rather than forcing her into a deeper depression, her sense of compassion swells. As the Banshee's desire to help grows, her physical and mental state embody a figure of quiet kindess. Though her pain never quite fades, she begins to find solace in her temporary connections with departing souls. She begins to find meaning in aiding others, and easing their anxiety-ridden minds.

     Though her human form was tragically murdered before she had accomplished anything, the Banshee finds in death a sense of purpose far greater than any she would have experienced in life. 

 

     For the cover art, I edited this beautiful painting by Mark Demsteader. 

All of the songs on this playlist are sung by women, as to reflect the character in my story.

The Banshee

1.  The Ghost Who Walks by Karen Elson
2. Okay by Flyleaf
3. Every Single Night by Fiona Apple
4. Dark Paradise (Cover) by vindicatedmess
5. Winter Is All Over You by First Aid Kit
6. Touch by Daughter
7. Sadness Is A Blessing by Lykke Li 
8. I'm So Sick (Acoustic) by Flyleaf
9. Me and the Devil by Soap&Skin
10. About Your Funeral by Soley 
11. Timshel (Cover) by Kina Grannis and her sisters
12. Misguided Ghosts by Paramore

♥ Happy Listening ♥

Travel Post #1: Berlin, Germany! (July 24th)

     Hello and Happy Thursday! :) Today, I am finally forcing myself to buckle down and begin blogging about my travels through Europe this summer. These posts will be going up throughout the next month or so, because unfortunately, breaking them up by day is the only way I can keep these entries from getting too long and unsightly. On top of that, I have just begun training for my new job, which is over eight hours per day. Plus I have 200ish pages of reading to get done before September 19th. Basically, doling these travel logs in small increments makes this process much less of a struggle. I'm sorry if it makes for tedious reading, but I hope you enjoy regardless!

July 24th, 2013

     After three connection flights and around 17 hours of travel, my two cousins, Kyle and Kenna, (You will be seeing a lot of them, so might as well give a proper introduction) and I arrived in the Berlin airport at about noon. Customs was practically nonexistent as we snaked our way to baggage claim, and luckily my sister, Natalie, was there to receive us on the other side. It was the first time I'd seen her in almost a year! As she'd been living in Berlin for 11 months, she showed us how to use the S-Bahn and refused to let us nap for more than an hour because she feared our sleeping schedule would be off for the duration of our trip. Though incredibly considerate of her, it meant we weren't allowed to go to bed until 9pm. Or, in our accustomed time zone, 12pm.

     The time awake was not too dreadful, however, because Natalie took us to East Side Gallery! It is this gorgeous collection of graffiti art on what still remains of the Berlin Wall. It's quite insane to think about the fact that 30 years ago, people could be murdered for attempting to climb over it. But I love that its dark past has been transformed into something beautiful, and something in constant fluctuation. Which I suppose could be extended into a metaphor about Germany itself. My sister claims the reason she loves Berlin so much is because it was weighed down by communism and war, but the city is now coming back alive! That must be fascinating to watch. I also became increasingly interested by the people in Berlin because, at least some of them, were walking pieces of history. Anyone over the age of 40 or so could potentially remember what it was like when the Wall was up. It was just a thought that struck me whenever I saw older folks. This is a bit of a ramble, but it's quite cool to think about. 

     I also really liked something fairly new on the Wall (my sister said she didn't recognize it from the last time she visited), which was a photography display of different walls keeping people fenced in and out throughout the world. There are a lot more than I knew about?! That's a quite frightening thought.... And the exhibition included the wall on the border of Mexico and California, which resonated with me for obvious reasons.

Anyway, here are some photos from the East Side Gallery :)

     For lunch, my cousins and I had Döner for the first time, which is a popular Turkish fast food item. Though I'm sure it is wonderful most of the time, this particular time there was a GIANT, BEIGE, HALF-MYTHICAL MOTH FLY THING desperately trying to escape from the glass compartment where the red onions were kept. It was just staring at me and desperately ramming into the glass after I'd finished ordering. But I had been in Germany for less than 24 hours, and I didn't want to be that entitled tourist, so I didn't say anything. In the end, I'm glad I didn't speak up because Natalie casually mentioned while we were eating outside that Europeans don't care as much about bugs landing in their food. Unfortunately, I'm a spoiled and picky Californian, so I was plagued by mothish-horror-filled thoughts, and could not finish my meal. But my sister loves Döner, so don't steer away from trying it simply because of this story! Haha. I'm just haunted by it... casually... I tried to eat a Döner sandwich in Vienna and literally couldn't get my mind over the matter. That was when I finally confessed a much less disturbing version of this story, in the hopes of explaining my point of view without ruining their lives as well.   

     Afterward, we also went to this airport-turned-public-park called Tempelhof to hang out with one of my sister's Spanish friends and just chill out for a bit. They drank beer. Kyle took a light snooze on the grass. We saw people dancing interpretively. It was nice.

      After a long day of walking and experimenting with new things, I made a bed on my sister's floor out of a single sheet with two puffy, winter coats underneath for padding. Needless to say, it took less than a half hour to fall asleep.

♥ To be continued... ♥

Music of the Month: August 2013

     If you read my "Back Home." post, you know that I went through a major LIGHTS phase while I was traveling around Europe. When I turned on my phone, she was the only artist I would think to listen to. When I was able to attract Wifi in our hostels, I feverishly looked up interviews and remixes and acoustic performances. Though I fell in love with a few songs off her Siberia (Acoustic) album, specifically the stripped down version of Toes, earlier in the year, this trip made me really appreciate Siberia itself.

     Never listened to Sibera (the album)? I highly recommend Flux and Flow (which I listened to A LOT on my trip, though I really do not care for the rap verse), Siberia, Cactus in the Valley, Suspension, And Counting (omfg when I looked this up on YouTube, the first choice was a video from Majestic Casual and I find that hilarious for some reason), and the lovely instrumental that is Day One. It feels a bit stupid to suggest that many songs, but it's a brilliant album. Siberia is a huge step up in complexity and rawness from The Listening. I prefer that grittiness to the clean sounds of her debut album. Basically, I'm just in love with the direction Lights is going. 

     I also think that her vocal abilities have skyrocketed over the past few years, as can be seen by this May 2013 performance in Toronto. I listened to this acoustic rendition of Flux and Flow almost as much as Lights' cover of "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" by U2.

     When I returned from my trip, I sorted through the entire month of Cathy's Tumblr that I missed, and read the most recent posts on her Blogspot (and by clicking over there I just realized I've missed her two most recent posts... how....), which lead me to rediscover Gravediggress by CocoRosie. Which I then had stuck in my head for three days. Not complaining whatsoever.

Links: Lovely New Discoveries of the Month

• A beautiful live arrangement of Sing to the Moon by Laura Mvula.
• MØ- Pilgrim, in which the video totally reminds me of old school Lana Del Rey clip splices.
• As discovered on August 31st, Narcissus is Back by Christine and the Queens. 
• While I was in Forever 21, Go to Sleep by Lupe Fiasco blasted throughout the store and it was great.
• I'm not sure if this counts as a new discovery because surely Cathy has shown me this song before, because I know she introduced me to the band earlier this year. But I really love this rooftop performance of Wolf by First Aid Kit.
• Though I'm not proud, I jam to Work by Iggy Azalea..... I'm just.... Sorry, guys.
• But to redeem myself, this month I jammed even more to The New Workout Plan by Kanye West.

  
      My favorite find of August was one given to me by none other than my best friend, Cathy. While I was in Europe, she found via Tumblr this list of "10 Queer Rappers You Should Check Out." Cathy showed me a fair few of the people on this page, and my favorite is most definitely RoxXxan. Her songs are catchy, British, and badass. I also really love the way she combines feminine and masculine elements into her work, and her personal style, particularly in the video for "Too Fucking Facety." Her sense of fashion in general is just really, really great. And that hair. And if you watch so much as one interview, you can tell she's smart as hell and understands that balance of self-image, marketing, masculinity, femininity, and being true to one's vision. She owns all of it without hesitation.

If you ever need a breath of life, listen to my favorite of RoxXxan's songs, "Power"

♥ Happy Listening ♥

Delta Rae: 8/31/13

     

     Wow, I just realized that it is September! Absolutely insane. I'm still adjusting to the fact that it is 2013, and yet we are quickly closing in on the end of the year. As it is, my summer is almost at an end. I start training for my new job this coming Wednesday. But I am so lucky to have spent my last Saturday night of exemption seeing Delta Rae live at a free lake concert. Everything about the experience felt so much like summer: lawn chairs, popcorn, old friends, outdoor music, drunk middle-aged white people, and fireworks at the end of the show. My friend even made a surprise guest appearance! It was a near-perfect evening. 

     A one-man band called Low Volts opened. Though his stage presence wasn't necessarily the best, it's kind of rough to be a great musician performing in a suburban town at a free concert like you don't matter. In truth, he was quite good! His show had a very rockabilly-vibe to it. I do not think the older people around us were his target audience, and thus they didn't really like him, but hopefully he still enjoyed the experience. 

He tweeted this last night:

And here's an Instagram video of the fireworks, as mentioned in said tweet.

     DELTA RAE came to the stage around 8PM. To be honest, I only knew one of their songs (and not from the True Blood promo, which I guess is a thing?! Did not know this until last night. Good for them!) and yet I was beyond giddy when they stepped on stage. I hadn't been to a concert in a very long time... experiencing live music at the hands of a really talented and passionate band is incredible. I feel seeing music live is the closest I'll ever get to ~religious experiences. Though some of Delta Rae's songs wade a little too far into the country genre for me, I loved their set! You can really tell how much they love what they do. And their diversity and talent is crazy. The bassist played an electric upright base and a bass guitar. The keyboardist also took to the guitar and sings really well. In fact, four of the members are incredibly talented vocalists who build their music off wicked harmonies, and took the lead position in turns. My favorite of which was Elizabeth Hopkins, whose voice was raspy and broken, and whose passion was obvious, whether she was singing lead or banging on the giant "Delta Rae" drum or shaking a tambourine for added percussion. Also, I found out afterward, three of the members are siblings with a rather confusing last name (Hölljes?!). That's pretty cool.

     If you get a chance to see Delta Rae live, please do. They have so much love for the music they play. And personally, I don't think their recorded tracks do justice to the quality of their songs.

Delta Rae will performing "If I Loved You" on the Conan O'Brien Show this Thursday!

 
     As there was no danger of my camera being knocked out of my hands by a rightfully-enthusiastic mosher, I decided to bring my Nikon D60 to the show. None of these photos are edited because I don't think they necessarily need it, and I've noticed that when I do edit pictures, they look CRAZY OVERDONE on Mac systems. The contrast ratio on their monitors is very, very different haha.

...And enjoy this magical creation that I made after the concert last night,
A.K.A. Cathy's new facebook profile picture: 

♥ Happy Listening ♥